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Harry Potter: Pre-HBP: Severus Snape
Title: Snape's Personal Hell
Completion: Completed
X-posted: aff.net, greatestjournal.com
Words: 714
Rating: PG
Pairings: None
Summary: Snape returns to the Dark Lord's manor only to find toddlers wreaking havoc.
Author's Notes: To cheer a friend up. I know, it's horrible, but she was amused.


The Dark Lord’s manor was full of commotion as toddlers bounded through the halls, occasionally breaking precious instruments of magical warfare. They were also managing to drive the one adult who was left close to the brink of insanity.

“Hehehehe, I poopie!” A small Antonin Dolohov giggled as a rancid smell enveloped a small room. The sole adult, Severus Snape, wrinkled his long nose in disgust.
“I am not cleaning that, Dolohov.” He grumbled as if the child were it’s former self.

At the moment, Snape felt like brutally murdering every member of the Order of the Phoenix. They had released a type of magical gas that reverted all in the manor back to their younger years. Toddler years to be more precise. He had just returned from an Order meeting to find the chaos that had taken over the manor.

“I want ice cream!” A shrill cry made Snape cover his ears.

“Too bad.” He quickly turned and glared at the little girl.

“Ice cream. Now.” The black-haired devil stood her ground and returned the glare. Snape could not believe he was having this conversation with her.

“I said no.” He growled impatiently. He was just turning around to stop the Dark Lord from biting Nagini when he felt himself being lifted into the air. “BELLATRIX PUT ME DOWN NOW!”

“Ice cream.” Bellatrix demanded again.

“Fine just put me down.” Snape grumbled in exasperation and withheld the urge to yell at the brat when he was dropped onto the hard ground. Another cry echoed through the room and he whirled around.

“My lord, get away from the…” He winced as one of the Dark Lord’s horcruxes exploded, sending snake entrails across the room. The Dark Lord would definitely be angry when he regained his senses. Once again Snape was called into action as he rushed to stop the young Rookwood from dropping Avery out of the window. He had just managed that situation when a different form of poisonous gas filled the room, causing the children to giggle and Snape to gag.

“Pettigrew…” He growled at the blushing, chubby child. Sensing danger, the boy shrieked girlishly and ran behind the Dark Lord’s throne. Another crash from across the room, followed by an insane giggle, reminded Snape that the Dark Lord was still breaking things in a fit of possible anger.

“My lord, please!” Snape attempted to reprimand the young Dark Lord as he sent a set of cursed armor flying. The Potions Master stepped forward, ready to send a freezing charm at the one he used to fear.

“Ice cream…” A low growl coming from behind him reminded Snape that Bellatrix was impatiently waiting for her frozen treat.

“You will wait!” Snape snapped at the child.

“BAD MAN!” The girl shrieked as she shot off a blast of fire, setting the young Dolohov on fire. After a painful argument between his consciences, Snape put the fire out. However, his nerves did not get much of a rest since Rookwood was back to his tricks; the toddler was trying to drop Lucius into a snake pit.

Things continued that way until hours later, when the gas finally wore off. The manor was a wreck, most of the Dark Lord’s serpents were mysteriously missing, and obscure magical devices that were used in warfare and torture were broken into pieces and scattered across hallways. On top of it all, Severus Snape was paler than ever and seemed to be in a place where nobody could reach him. His pupils were dilated as he stared into space, a mingled look of exasperation and horror on his face.

“My lord…” Bellatrix, now an adult, smiled at the Dark Lord, also returned to his ‘normal’ state, and she glanced towards where Snape stood.

An evil grin spread across the Dark Lord’s snakelike face, sending terrified chills up every person’s spines. “Severus, if you do not hurry you shall be late to class. The children will miss you.” He smirked as he caught the look of fright that came upon Snape’s face when the word ‘children’ was mentioned and he flicked his wand, sending the Potions Master away. The Dark Lord then turned his mind onto other matters. Like where was Nagini?